I have had two people inquire as to why I have not renewed my blog and continue to write, with roughly 75% of my readership on pins and needles awaiting my return to the keyboard I figured I owed it to them to continue to plow forward in these trying times and write about my life, the Dutch life. I just purchased a new domain Dutchlife.blog, I have no idea how to transfer this domain and blog to that domain but I am sure I should be able to figure it out at some point.

My latest misadventure occurred last week Thursday as I was taking the kids to school. I typically take the kids to school and they take the bus home. This gives me an opportunity to talk to them about a lot of different things, unfortunately that morning I was preoccupied due to the fact that the driver in front of me was a terrible driver. He almost caused an accident by making a left turn in front of a car turning left onto the street we were on. I am pretty sure the guy didn’t have any idea that he had almost caused an accident and continued on his merry way. The road he turned onto, as did I, is a windy road with a 35mph speed limit. However, he slowed all the way down to 20 mph and I was in no mood to be stuck behind him so I took the opportunity to get around him in a no passing zone, I hit the gas and Aiden looked at me and said “what the fuck!” fortunately this was not a surprise and did not hamper me from focusing on getting past the vehicle ahead of me. While my driving was not exactly in compliance with local and state traffic laws it was the proper thing to do. The only problem with my move, other than almost causing Aiden to poop his pants out of fear, was that there was a stop sign coming up and I as I passed the annoyingly slow driver he lost his shit and gave me double middle fingers. As I pulled up to the stop sign I rolled my window down and began yelling in his direction that he was a terrible driver. My kids were dismayed but this did not stop me from yelling. He pulled out quite aggressively and tailgated me all the way to my next turn. Had he driven like that in the first place we wouldn’t have been in the situation.

There has been a lot going on since I last blogged, and most of it hasn’t been good. One of those things, the result of the presidential election, has been a hot topic in our home. While I voted for the Libertarian presidential candidate, I still was hoping that Sleepy Joe would either lose or die before the results were certified. However, something tells me that had he passed away, his VP would have become president which may have ended up being a worse result, just like if Michigan was somehow able to unburden itself of it’s current imbecile of a governor, her lieutenant governor would just take over and do the same misguided and illogical things that she is currently doing in the name of saving lives. Regardless of your political affiliation, this is nonsense. That being said, Aiden asked me shortly after Biden had “won” the election “why does Trump keep trying to win?” Obviously there are a lot of reasons, but I simplified it for him. “Aiden, Trump wants to win because Biden is going to make a horrible president.” “why dad, why will he be a horrible president?”

“Well Aiden, he wants to take your stuff away and give it to people who don’t have stuff, in the alternative he wants to take mom and dad’s stuff away so we can’t buy you more stuff.”

“You mean he wants to take my legos away and give them to someone else?”

“Yes, and the person he gives your legos to may not even like legos or even know how to put legos together.”

His perspective on Biden and Trump has changed significantly since our conversation.

Speaking of stuff, my kids have been pestering me about a new x box or PS5. While I have never been that into video games, when it comes to something like this its more the thrill of the hunt than the actual kill. For some reason I had my mind set on getting my hands on a PS5 or an XBOX. The problem is the inventory for either one was even slimmer than indoor dining options in Michigan the past three weeks. Walmart was going to have them available the Wednesday night before Thanksgiving at 9pm and Game Stop would have a few in the store Black Friday morning. I missed my window on Wednesday night and logged on around 9:20 to discover Walmart was all sold out. I had stopped at Game stop that day to see what they had to offer but the clerk would not tell me how many they would have available, she did indicate that people would likely start lining up Thanksgiving night, as Aiden would say “What the Fuck?” I decided to jump on Ebay which required me to create an account, I may have had an account in the early 2000’s but I did not remember the specifics so I created a new one. I immediately found an X box to bid on and was outbid in a matter of minutes. I was honest with myself and realized that Ebay wasn’t the platform for me to obtain a gaming console. However, there was one thing that I knew would not let me down, Craigslist, it has never failed me, I managed to obtain a pitcher for our co-ed softball team off Craigslist as well as a place to keep my boat that allowed me access to the Thornapple river. I am sure there have been a lot of other good things that have come my way via Craig’s List, but the list is too long and my memory is too short to list them all. I managed to make contact with Ray out of East Lansing and scheduled a rendezvous at the East Lansing Police Department Friday morning at 9am. In my mind I would meet Ray I would tell him my kids are spoiled rotten and that they didn’t deserve this. I would also got on to tell him about how horrible my child hood was and that my parents would never have done something this amazing for me or my siblings even though I at least, deserved something like this way more than my kids deserve it. I would finish the meeting by telling him that I am probably the world’s greatest dad and even though I am, my kids will show very little gratitude when they open the X box and I will immediately regret giving them such a selfless gift and that my kids will have no idea the kind of shit I went through to pull this off.

As I approached East Lansing I received a text from Ray wondering if I was close, I texted him back that I was about five minutes out. He indicated he was in a blue Explorer, my heart started racing, this was really happening, the fruits of my labor were finally going to pay off and I was about to obtain one of the most coveted Christmas gifts for my kids in 2020. I pulled up handed over the undisclosed amount of cash, he counted it and proceeded to hand me the new X box unopened in its box. It was anticlimactic to say the least. On my way home Shirley called and asked where I was, I told her I had been doing some Black Friday shopping. “You bought an X box didn’t you?”

“Yes”

“How much did you pay for it?”

“%$^&***”

“You paid what for it!”

“Just let this be my thing”